pure intention...

I felt sad and disappointed about myself today. My heart is clean and pure.That I can assure of if your my friend. Even your just a stranger to me, I will make sure to treat you nice if you treat me nice as well.

Well, yesterday A very special person close to my heart offers me something. I knew that the offer is very genuine and sincere. I honestly don't want to take advantage to anyone. That's what I knew about myself for a long time. I asked advice from friends and they told me to grab the offer. I wanted too because the fact of the matter is I need it also. But the thing is my shyness over power me. I just can't say yes right away just because I need it. There is a feeling involve in the situation.

My final decision is NO. and now I don't know how it feels on his part.. If he will continue communicating then I'll be happy but if he won't I know I will feel bad about myself..

Thinking about him stop talking to me makes me feel sad :(